Upon waking from my slumber, I casually rolled out of bed and decided I wanted a few new things from the stealers for the car, one of which being a new air filter. Through tiny gaps in the curtains, shafts of sunlight beamed and bathed the room in a warm, comforting glow. It was time to head out.
After a pleasant experience at the local Volkswagen garage, I procured the appropriate parts and headed home. Donning sunglasses, I wound the windows down and raised the volume of my stereo. The warm weather, the glorious sound of hip-hop emanating from the speakers and the satisfaction of my new purchases left an equally warm glow inside me. It was definitely time for a leisurely drive.
The ten minute journey home became a half-hour cruise, entirely pleasurable. Having arrived at my stately manor, I decided a quick lunch was in order. On the menu was the left over pizza and nachos from the previous night's entertainment. Once finished, I quaffed some lemonade to chase down my meal.
Feeling more than satisfied, I perused my computer and had a brief read of this page
>clicky<. Making a mental note of the salient points, I prepared my sack and headed towards the car. The sack was placed on a table in the garage, its contents loosely spilling out - screwdriver set, multiple multicoloured microfibre cloths and various lotions decorated the table top.
A tap on the keys, a pull of a handle, a yank of a lever and the press of a button was all that was required to open the bonnet. Carefully studying the view before me, I recalled the earlier description and started removing clips and sensors. Now I was ready to remove the bonnet.
Huck!
Heave!
It didn't shift. I tried again.
Puuuulll!
Yaaank!No. Nothing. It wouldn't budge.
Blaming my weakened state on a full belly, I proceeded to remove the fog grilles. They'd been soiled for a long time and were often missed during regular washes. After some degreaser, shampoo and rinse, the grilles were left to bask in the sun to dry.
Again, I tried to remove the engine cover. It failed to budge.
Turning my attention to the fog grilles, I slathered them in copious amounts of Autoglym Rubber and Vinyl Trim cleaner before dabbing them dry with a cloth.
Again, I tried and tried and tried to remove the cover. I pondered over the possibilities and yet none struck me as viable without the pertinent risk of damage to the remainder of the vehicle.
I proceeded to clean the foglights before refitting the grilles.
Another attempt in removing the cover failed.
I decided enough was enough. It was time to summon supernatural forces.
I raised aloft my magic sword and said:
"By the Power of Greyskull, I HAVE THE POWER!!!!"Placing my now empowered fingers under the cover, I pulled with all my might, extending from my feet all the way to my fingers.
Nothing.
I called on the strength of Conan, Hercules and Samson.
It would not budge.
I called on the might of the Power Rangers.
Nothing.
Gah! Grrrr! Hulk Smash!
After multiple futile attempts, I returned to my demure self and proceeded to clean the windows and top up the washer fluid. My ego deflated, my happiness gone, my fingers aching, I sit in a darkened room as I tell my tale of woe.
Maybe tomorrow, I'll pray.
