Hi I'm not sure on the adaptor but if you press the setup button for approx 20 second you should get into the hidden menu but this can some times be depend on your firmware
What are you going to connect the lightnigfng adaptor to? You must have an MDI kit or something I guess? But no, it won't work. If you have an MDI kit then you'll need to buy the genuine VW lead to suit the iphone 5.