Come on, someone must have some thoughts !
By way of update, tried re bleeding the hydraulics, also put a clear plastic pipe on the bleed nipple, opened it and got a friend to push the pedal, fluid rose up the pipe 6" or so - that, I think shows the master cylinder is doing its job.
So, took the box out, clutch off, and it looks ok, although I did notice that the pressure plate friction surface is slightly concave - put a ruler across- it touches at the outer circumference, but there is a gap off approx 1mm to the inner circumference, and the driver plate is clearly more worn on the outer on that side, suggesting that plate has been concave for some time and probably shouldn't be. Driven plate is 7.5 mm thick at the outer, 8mm inner. Pointless putting anything suspect back in so its having a new pressure plate and driven plate.
I tested the slave cylinder by attaching a clear tube and pushing it in- fluid goes up the tube as expected, smooth action and no leaks.
The DMF has about 20mm play when rotated - dosnt seem excessive- I have seen reference to 20 degrees being acceptable, and it also rocks, ie when I push one side in towards the engine and then the other it rocks by about 5mm total, I don't know if that's acceptable or not ?
Tempted to replace the lot, DMF clutch and slave, but never like replacing things just to see if it cures a problem. I would have been happy to see one or more clearly knackered bits !!
I did check the gearbox - rotating the input by hand, selecting gears etc - all seems fine